She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize