That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize
