Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
