i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
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Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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