it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
