the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize