I cockslap morals
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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