He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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