I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
