I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
