i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
