My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Randomize