Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
