He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize