I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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