Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
