we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just pynch a tree in the face
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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