Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.