This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize
