Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
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