it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
