Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
