my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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