Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
