Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
