Buhtt sex?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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