So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Randomize
