break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
