Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
