If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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