I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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