Sry I called you an 8
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
You know, be my cock's hype man.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize