ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
