I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
