Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
this boner is exhausting
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
