hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
