It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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