the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
