Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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