We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Randomize