So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
