Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
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I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
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It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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