i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize