I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
