I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize