I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize