covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Dick very happy bro
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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