so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
