Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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