so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
