Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
