How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I feel great
I just peed on a car
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize