Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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