So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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